(wiki-special opens inside Texas Motor Speedway outside Sandy's hauler, with Sandy, Spongebob, Patrick, Timmy, Bubbles, Edd, Jackie, Squidward, Rudy, Penny, Ed, Lisa, Bart, and Buttercup eating breakfast)
Edd: Guys, I'm gonna go to the hauler for something, I'll be right back. *enters Sandy's hauler*
Sandy (as Edd entered the hauler): Here ya go, Double-Dude! Fresh Texas-style toast (referring to french toast), some eggs and smokin' hot hash browns! Hey, where DID Double-Dude go?
Jackie: He went in the hauler for something, he said he'd be right back.
Sandy: I'm gonna go in the hauler anyway to let him know that his breakfast is on the table. *enters the hauler* *scene cuts to Sandy's hauler*
Sandy (while entering the hauler): Hey Double-Dude, food's on the table--. *suddenly hears Edd sobbing out of sorrow* *gasps softly* (to herself) Oh no, what's that poor dude cryin' about? I gotta see and give him a helpin' hand. (out loud to Edd / calmly) Shoot, what's the matter, Double-Dude. Don't'cha wanna fuel up so you can try and win the race today and get the trophy?
Edd (sadly): Actually, Sandy... *sad sigh*... I'm trying to win this for much more than a trophy. (referring to trying to win for his deceased brother, Edwin Marion who was killed in a NASCAR Busch Series accident the week prior in Citysville / in reference to the "2000 My Little Pony: Friendship Is NASCAR 500 Fantasy Edition" wiki)
Sandy (calmly): Awwww.... you're talkin' about your passed brother, aren't ya? *hugs Edd* But look in the bright side, he's lookin' all over ya and Team Fastex like a jackrabbit lookin' after her bunnies.
Edd (sadly): Oh, bless you. bless you, Sandy! *sadly sniffs* That's very reassuring! It's just...I find it's in my nature to win for my brother and make history for our family name! *Sandy hugs him*
Sandy (soothingly): I know, Double-Dude, I know. *scene cuts to outside Sandy's hauler*
Timmy: Trust me, guys. I've BEEN to Texas before, and that was for an epic cage match Cosmo and Wanda had with Jorgen Von Strangle. (referring to "The Fairly OddParents" episode "Most Wanted Wish")
Squidward: Heaven knows just WHAT dare I ask they were brawling over.
Ed: Like ice cream?
Patrick: Ice cream!!!! Can we get some after the race?!!!
Sandy (while exiting the hauler with Edd): But in Texas, Patrick, we call that stuff "Frozen Cow Juice".
Spongebob: Hiya, Sandy! How did you make out with Edd?
Sandy: Hush Spongebob, don't'cha know we have to be easy on Double-Dude this week and for possibly 3 weeks?
Spongebob (with tears in his eyes as he did in the "Spongebob Squarepants" episode "Lost Matress"): I'm sorry, Sandy. I didn't know that Edd was still grie-- *Sandy immediately covers his mouth*
Sandy (in a whispering tone / while covering his mouth): Spongebob?!
Spongebob (while Sandy was covering his mouth / muffled): Sorry, Sandy.
Timmy: Uh, hello? Can we eat here, please and talk about today's strategies we might use against REXCOR today? So Bubbles, so what do you think about us giving REXCOR the "Texas Two-Step"?
Bubbles: It was the best moment of my little racing life yet! *giggles*
Sandy: Yeah, and I'll send that no-good Trouble Bass spinnin' like a Texas twister, as you can see I was born here in Fort Worth, Texas! And remember, you mess with the bull, you get the horns!
Rudy: But Sandy, Fuzzy Lumpkins is from Texas, too! You'd better be careful out there.
Sandy: Don't y'all worry, Rudy. I ain't lettin' that big-a--*bleep* critter send me tumblin' like a Texas Tumbleweed. He'll mind as well see me "square-dancin'" in the frontstretch grass when the race is finished! YEE-HAW!!!!
Buttercup: And don't forget, Texas Terry and his bro, Bobby Labonte were from here in Texas.
Bart: Yeah, and I was glad to get his autograph. But now, we're the the ones signing autographs thanks to Jack!
Lisa: You mean, MR. FASSLER, Bart?
Bart: Whatever! *takes a bite of his maple breakfast sausage* *scene cuts to "NASCAR Raceday: Served By The Krusty Krab"*
Bob Jenkins (ESPN): Us at ESPN welcome you to the Texas Motor Speedway in Fort Worth, Texas for today's running of the KWIK-E-MART 500! This Lone-Star facility was christened in 1997, and won by Jeff Burton, who received his first career win in that very event. But now in NASCAR's first Team Championship between Team Fastex and Team REXCOR, both teams must avoid being "snake-bitten" at this tricky quad-oval. Hello everyone, I'm Bob Jenkins alongside former NASCAR Champion and race-analyst, Benny Parsons, and BP, this track is sure full of surprises.
Benny Parsons (ESPN): Indeed it is, Bob. This place, the Texas Motor Speedway can really kill your tires and send ya into the wall. You MUST save your tires in this race in order to hopefully be in contention to win here in Texas. We remember from the very first race here in 1997 when a multi-car accident occurred on the very first lap of this speedway, these new drivers and teams wouldn't wanna recreate that same fate.
Bob Jenkins (ESPN): There was a moment of silence in today's opening ceremonies today due to last week's catastrophe. *scene transitions to Edwin Marion's fatal accident in Citysville from the previous weekend* Last Saturday evening, we had lost one of possibly the greatest future Winston Cup Series star for Team Fastex, Edwin Marion after he was killed in last week's Busch Series race in Citysville. *scene then transitions into Edwin's winning moments in motorsports* Edwin was known for his talent, passion, and consistency in winning motorsports events, he raced, go-carts, sprint-cars, and modifieds before coming to NASCAR and only won 1 race in the NASCAR Busch Series before his horrific tragedy. *scene then transitions to Edwin's picture saying "1984-2000"* Our condolences go out to him and his family, especially *scene transitions to an overview of Edd's car, lined up in the pits* the driver in the 20 Home Depot Pontiac, Eddward "Double-D" Marion who starts 8th today. *scene fades into the ESPN Broadcast Booth*
Benny Parsons (ESPN): Man, that poor kid really took it hard this week, and his teammates kindly went easy on him, knowing that Edwin Marion was his older brother.
Bob Jenkins (ESPN): As said on his interview in our pre-race show, prior to driver introductions, Eddward Marion will try and win "for much more than a trophy", and how a win would really mean to his family and team. The drivers are ready, the fans are ready, and WE'RE ready for the starting of the engines here in Texas. Let's go trackside for the command!
Track P.A Announcer: And now for the most famous words in all of motorsports, please welcome your grand marshals for today's running of the KWIK-E-MART 500, Texas natives, Rich Texan (from "The Simpsons"), and WWE Superstar, "Stone Cold" Steve Austin!
Rich Texan: Alright, fellow Texas racefans! Get on yo feet and make some noise!!!! *crowd screams and cheers loudly*
"Stone Cold" Steve Austin: Let's set these 43 bulls loose, ya'll ready?! *crowd screams and cheers loudly*
Rich Texan: Let's gee-ter done!
"Stone Cold" Steve Austin: And the bottom line for us Texan is...
Rich Texan and "Stone Cold" Steve Austin: GENTLEMEN, START YOUR ENGINES!!!!! *crowd HYSTERICALLY cheers loudly*
Rich Texan (in unison to the HYSTERICALLY cheering crowd): YEE-HAW!!!! *in unison, fires his 2 guns in the air*
engines start and rev loudly, in unison to the HYSTERICALLY cheering crowd*
Bob Jenkins (ESPN / in unison to the fans HYSTERICALLY cheering): We're glad you're with us on ESPN on this beautiful afternoon here in Texas! We're just about set to go in the KWIK-E-MART 500 here in Texas Motor Speedway *crowd cheers LOUDER as the pace-car pulls into the pits* as the the pace-car pulls onto pit-road! Here we go for 334 laps here in the Lone-Star State, *cars accelerate to take the green flag waved by Apu Nahasapeemapetilon, in unison to the HYSTERICALLY cheering crowd* as Apu Nahasapeemapetilon waves the green flag! The KWIK-E-MART 500 is underway!
Doug Rice (PRN Radio): The green flag is in the air and we're underway here in Texas! Quickly jumping to the point is Rudy Tabootie on the bottom! He's being pushed along by Ed Monobrow as they roll into Turn #1!
Rob Albright (PRN Radio): The "square-dance" begins here in Texas! Rudy Tabootie leads, the fight for 2nd is on between the Chevrolet of Eddy McRich and the Pontiac of Ed Monobrow! They battle off Turn #2!
Pat Patterson (PRN Radio): Ed Monobrow's on the inside, tryin' to battle for that 2nd spot! Eddy McRich is on the outside! They race into Turn #3, now McRich "rockets" into the corner and will pick up the 2nd spot off Turn #4!
Mark Garrow (PRN Radio): Meanwhile, Sandy Cheeks is putting pressure on Ed Monobrow as they try to battle for the 3rd spot! Behind Cheeks, it's Cindy Vortex, then Denzel Crocker, and Bart Simpson!
Rob Albright (PRN Radio): It's single-file, back to the 6th position! That's where Fuzzy Lumpkins goes to the high side of the racetrack! He's been by-passed by Cindy Vortex, now getting around him is Bart Simpson!
Pat Patterson (PRN Radio): Dennzel Crocker's still battlin' hard, tryin' to pick that spot back up! Bart Simpson is battlin' underneath him right now as they race into Turn #3! Rudy Tabootie, meanwhile leads off Turn #4!
Doug Rice (PRN Radio): Rolling outta Turn #4 and comin' back to the line, it's gonna be Rudy Tabootie, Eddy McRich, Ed Monobrow, Sandy Cheeks, hanging onto the 5th spot is Cindy Vortex, and Bart Simpson is makin' a bit of a move!
Rob Albright (PRN Radio): The one most talked about today, Eddward Marion just gave up a position, he just lost the 8th spot to Francis Bull-E! Very high on the racetrack is Timmy Turner, trying to chase down Imaginary Gary off Turn #2! *scene cuts to Timmy's cockpit*
(on the backstretch and Turn #3)
Timmy (battling for 10th): C'mon, Edd! Focus! Don't let your emotions get the best of you! *scene cuts to Edd's cockpit*
Edd (in 9th): I'm trying my best,Timmy! I'm trying to do what my brother, Edwin would do! *scene cuts to Timmy's cockpit*
Timmy (battling for 10th): And he wants ya to win, Edd! C'mon, Double-Dude, you can pull through throughout this race!
(Lap 15 out of 334 laps / under the 1st caution flag after Jimmy's Lap 12 crash)
Doug Rice (PRN Radio): Pit-road is gonna be pretty busy right now as the leaders and the rest of the field now come to pit-road for their first pit-stops of the day. Let's first go to Jim Noble!
Jim Noble (PRN Radio / pit reporter): Timmy Turner's taking on 4 tires and a full tank of fuel! A few wedge adjustments will be made on the #24 DUPONT Chevrolet to get the car handing right in the corners! To Brett McMillan!
Brett McMillan (PRN Radio / pit reporter): Sandy Cheeks will take the same, 4 tires and a full tank of fuel! Sandy said on her radio that the car struggles off the corners, so they're gonna make some wedge adjustments on the #22 CATERPILLAR Pontiac! To Steve Richards!
Steve Richards (PRN Radio / pit reporter): Eddy McRich also takes 4 tires and fuel, Eddy said on his radio that the car's handling perfectly, but he radioed to the #3 crew that they need to make a few wedge adjustments so that the car would REMAIN in good form in order to hopefully catch race leader Rudy Tabootie! *scene cuts to the ESPN Broadcast Booth*
Bob Jenkins (ESPN): Rudy Tabootie will win the race off pit-road *scene cuts back to the track* and remains the race leader, but now we have a penalty assessed to Sandy Cheeks for being too fast off of pit-road, and she'll end up at the tail-end of the longest line in result of that black-flag.
Benny Parsons (ESPN): And that flag is what "Cowgirl Sandy" don't want to see. *scene cuts to Sandy's cockpit*
Sandy: What?! *growls* DANG-GUMMIT!!!! Why did NASCAR have to black-flag me!
Duck (voice only): NASCAR had busted you for speeding off of pit-road, and they now want you to restart at the back of the field.
Sandy: *growls* DANG-GUMMIT!!!!
Nelson (voice only): HA HA!!!!
Sandy: Will ya shut your fu--*bleep*--in' yap, Nelson?! *scene cuts to the track*
Doug Rice (PRN Radio): They come back to the start/finish line to complete Lap 17, the green flag waves and we're back to racing! Rudy Tabootie gets a good jump at the restart! To his outside is Eddy McRich! Behind him is Cindy Vortex and Ed Monobrow! *scene cuts to Eddy's cockpit*
(in Turns 1 & 2)
Eddy (in 2nd): Give it up, pigeon! Give the lead to "Marshal Eddy" (in reference to the EENE episode "Know-It-All Ed")
Rudy (in 1st): Stay off my bumper, "Marshal Horsehead!"
Eddy (in 2nd / voice only) NA-UH! *scene cuts back to the track*
Pat Patterson (PRN Radio): REXCOR and Fastex, side by side, down the backstretch here in Texas! The Fastex driver at the bottom is Rudy Tabootie, but battlin' back on the top side is Eddy McRich, he wants the lead!
Mark Garrow (PRN Radio): They're door-to-door at the exit of Turn #4! Down to the stripe to complete Lap #18, it's Eddy McRich by inches on the outside, but battling back to the bottom and back to the lead is Rudy Tabootie!
Rob Albright (PRN Radio): And behind the leaders is Homer Simpson! He's just taken the 4th position away from Cindy Vortex, but the fight continues to race for the top spot!
Pat Patterson (PRN Radio): Eddy McRich will take the lead down the backstretch, and Rudy Tabootie will duck in right behind him! 3 car-lengths back is Ed Monobrow! Monobrow's on the bottom of the racetrack, and Cindy Vortex is challenging Homer Simpson off of Turn #4!
Bob Jenkins (ESPN / in unison to the HYSTERICALLY cheering crowd cheering Edd on):We now have 7 laps to go in the KWIK-E-MART 500 here in Texas Motor Speedway *scene cuts to the track* as Eddward Marion is closing in more and more on race leader, Denzel Crocker with each passing lap. We remembered that Eddward had lost his brother, Edwin in a BUSCH Series accident a week ago in Citysville, and now Edd is trying to do something special and that is win this race, and take his whole family and team to Victory Lane to honor the memory of his deceased brother, and resonate his family name!
Benny Parsons (ESPN / in unison to the HYSTERICALLY cheering crowd cheering Edd on): Man, oh man! Double-D is CHARGIN' those corners! He WANTS to win this race for Edwin, but catchin' Crocker's one thing, passin' him's another! (scene cuts to Crocker's cockpit)
(On the backstraightaway, and in Turns 3 & 4)
Crocker (in 1st): You feeling weak now, sock-headed fool?! *scene cuts to Edd's cockpit*
Edd (in 2nd / bravely): NEVER! I'm winning this for Edwin and showing you everyone what Marion's are made of! *scene cuts to Crocker's cockpit*
Crocker (in 1st): HAH! I doubt it! *scene cuts to the track*
Mark Garrow (PRN Radio): Again, Edd makes up more ground! Just 6 laps to go! Crocker's clinging to the #1 spot! Marion again tries tracking him down!
Rob Albright (PRN Radio): They're still time as this front pair begins to close in on a couple of lapped cars! Could they play a factor before this is over?! Double-D's creeping closer, just a car-length behind Crocker!
Pat Patterson (PRN Radio): Eddward Marion's uses the bottom of the racetrack in Turns 1 & 2! Let's see what he'll do this time in Turns 3 & 4! They are gonna be catchin' some lapped-traffic here! Double-D now pulls within' 1 car-length of Denzel Crocker, and will hold it at 1 car-length as they stay in each other's tire-tracks off Turn #4!
Doug Rice (PRN Radio): With just 5 laps to go, Eddward Marion's trying to give the fans a memorable finish here in Texas as he has caught Denzel Crocker! Catching's one thing, passing's a whole different story! Down to Turn #1, here comes Marion!
Bob Jenkins (ESPN / in unison to the HYSTERICALLY cheering crowd cheering Edd on): 6 laps to go! Crocker STILL leads team-rival Eddward Marion, who is in DESPERATE need of a win to commemorate his deceased brother, and late NASCAR Busch Series driver Edwin Marion's loving memory!
Benny Parsons (ESPN / in unison to the HYSTERICALLY cheering crowd cheering Edd on): Double-D closes on him AGAIN, Bob! But STILL he can't get alongside the #99 car! *scene cuts to Edd's cockpit*
(On backstretch, backstraightaway, and in Turns 3 & 4)
Edd (in 2nd): *pants sadly* I'm trying my best to get up to him, Turtledove! I just can't let my emotions get the best of me! *scene cuts to Jackie in Edd's pitbox*
Jackie (worried / on her radio communicating with Edd): Edd, PLEASE pay attention! You NEED to focus on Crocker! Please don't emotionally fall apart in the car! *scene cuts to Edd's cockpit* (voice only) You NEED to win this for Edwin! *scene cuts to Crocker's cockpit*
Crocker (in 1st): HEH! You can't even beat me with your boo-boo face in the way! You will whine like a big baby once I win and embarrass your family name! *laughs evilly* *scene cuts to Edd's cockpit*
Edd (in 2nd): *tears up emotionally* *scene cuts to the track*
Bob Jenkins (ESPN / in unison to the HYSTERICALLY cheering crowd cheering Edd on): Edd loses ground of Crocker there as they now come back to the start/finish line! 5 laps to go here in Texas! Denzel Crocker still leads over Eddward Marion, trying HARD not to emotionally break down in the racecar!
Benny Parsons (ESPN / in unison to the HYSTERICALLY cheering crowd cheering Edd on): Man, Edd WANTS to win this badly for his brother, but he MUST battle his EMOTIONS as well!
Bob Jenkins (ESPN / in unison to the HYSTERICALLY cheering crowd cheering Edd on): Marion's now side-by-side wit Crocker! Will he get him...? Not there, as Crocker sprints ahead once again off the 2nd corner! *scene cuts to Jackie in Edd's pitbox*
(backstretch, backstaightaway, and in Turns 3 & 4)
Jackie (worried / on her radio communicating with Edd): C'mon, Dubs! Don't break down, PLEASE! Edwin WANTS you to win this! *scene cuts to Edd's cockpit* (voice only) He's WITH you in your heart and he LOVES you! He WANTS you to try your best and be like him when it comes to being consistent and winning races to boost your family name! He BELIEVES you can do it! If he can do it, YOU can do it!
Edd (in 2nd / emotionally feeling better little by little / thinking to himself): Jackie is RIGHT. I might have lost my dearest older brother.... but I can STILL pull off an incredible victory for him and resonate my family name because he loves me and I can't let him and my ENTIRE family down!!!! *scene cuts to the track*
Mark Garrow (PRN Radio / in unison to the HYSTERICALLY cheering crowd cheering Edd on): Crocker still leads off Turn #4 as they come back to the start/finish line with mow 4 laps to go in the KWIK-E-MART 500! Marion goes for Crocker again as they head back to Turn #1!
Rob Albright (PRN Radio): 2 Team rivals going at it right now for the win here in Texas! Crocker wants to win for a playoff spot, but Marion wants to win for his brother, *with sudden realization* if he can get around him, HERE HE COMES! *audio switches to ESPN*
(ESPN / in unison to the HYSTERICALLY cheering crowd cheering Edd on):
Bob Jenkins (ESPN / in unison to the HYSTERICALLY cheering crowd cheering Edd on): Off Turn #2, Crocker still leads, and now Marion goes on the attack on the inside line and pulls up alongside! As they enter Turn #3, they're side-by-side and Marion has the LEAD! *crowd cheers LOUDER as Edd takes the lead*
Benny Parsons (ESPN / in unison to the HYSTERICALLY cheering crowd cheering Edd on): Man oh man! These fans are lovin' this, Bob! Ain't none of them are sittin' down now! *scene cuts to Edd's pitbox*
Jackie (on the pit-stool): C'mon Dubs!!!! You can do it!!!! Hold him off for your brother!!!!
(3 laps later)
Bob Jenkins (ESPN / in unison to the HYSTERICALLY cheering crowd cheering Edd on): The white flag is out for Eddward Marion! Will he hold it, or will Crocker somehow make a vicious charge to the front, in which he has no time and laps to do so?!
Benny Parsons (ESPN / in unison to the HYSTERICALLY cheering crowd cheering Edd on): Oh Crocker won't make it, Bob! That Double-D is just TOO FAST!
Bob Jenkins (ESPN / in unison to the HYSTERICALLY cheering crowd cheering Edd on): It had been an EXTREMELY difficult 7 days for Eddward Marion after the tragic loss of his older brother and NASCAR Busch Series driver, Edwin Marion, but now he trying to do something FOR him and for the love family, and that is take them all to Victory Lane! Here he comes off the final corners! Eddward Marion will come off Turn #4, looking for the checkered flag... *crowd cheers EXTREMELY LOUDLY as the checkered flag waves and Edd races by the start/finish line to win the race* .... and Eddward Marion will WIN the KWIK-E-MART 500 here in Texas Motor Speedway!